On Writing in The Sims: The Bestselling Author Aspiration & All Its Associated Lies

I'LL PROBABLY NEVER MAKE A LIVING OFF WRITING ALONE

Let em down slowly…

IRL, I am entering the final year of my MFA for Creative Writing. Long before I had The Sims, I had a notebook and was always writing, writing, writing. I never said those stories were good, but I was definitely the only kid I knew who had a stack of composition notebooks covered in Dollar Tree Lisa Frank-knockoff rainbow stickers under my bed full of original handwritten short stories.

I love writing, but sometimes I need a break. So I escape to The Sims to play as a Sim with the “Bestselling Author” life aspiration.

The goals and challenges make relative sense to the world building of the game, but it would be ridiculous to impose the same career standards onto writers in the real world.

The Bestselling Author aspiration in The Sims is not meant to be that serious, and it isn’t. However, I figured it would be a satirical way to talk about the writer lifestyle and if I think I’ll ever be a bestselling author IRL.

Back to the writer’s room…

When you create your Sim, you customize not only the body and clothing options, but also the personalities (through likes/dislikes, traits, and an overall life aspiration to complete before dying). In The Sims 2, players also had the option to select sexual turn-offs or turn-ons (a feature apparently coming with the newest Sims 4 expansion pack).

Whatever you select for the Sim’s aspiration is their sole purpose of existence. It’s the one thing they want to accomplish with their short, pixelated life.

To achieve the Bestselling Author aspiration, your Sim must complete a specific set of challenges.

The first milestone level is Fledge-linguist and is achieved by completing two tasks:

• Write for an Hour While Inspired.

• Write 2 Books.

One of these I do fairly often, the other I have never done before. Can you guess which is which?

The second milestone level is Competent Wordsmith and is achieved by completing three tasks:

• Reach Level 4 in the Writing Skill.

• Write for 15 Total Hours.

• Write 5 Good Books.

I don’t know what a Level 4 Writing Skill would look like in real life, but I can guarantee its qualifications would be highly subjective. All writing—all art—is. Perhaps everything is subjective. However, whatever a Level 4 means, I think I can consider myself to have surpassed that level by now. Writing for 15 total hours? Done. But writing 5 GOOD books? IRL, I’ve yet to write one book at all.

The third milestone level is Novelest Novelist and is achieved by completing three tasks:

• Reach Level 6 in the Writing skill.

• Publish 10 Books.

• Write 5 Excellent Books.

I’m not as confident to say I’ve surpassed Level 6 writing skill, whatever it means. And here’s where the plot goes way off the rails—PUBLISH TEN BOOKS? That is not an industry standard, I can guarantee you that. And writing FIVE excellent books? I’m not sure I have that many in me, in my lifetime. But let’s say, in general, I do feel like this is accomplishable.

Then to finally become a Bestselling Author, your Sim must complete three final tasks:

• Reach Level 10 in the Writing skill.

• Write 3 Bestsellers.

• Earn 25,000 Simoleons in Royalties through Publishing Books.

I guess if being a bestselling author was easy, everyone would do it. Out here, there’s no perfect mastery of the writing skill. In game, this is an easily obtainable level. You just make your Sim sit down at the computer and glitch until eventually they write enough high-quality novels (which they can somehow complete in like a singular Sim day). As for the 25,000 Simoleons…I would hope, even with shit market rates, that after publishing (according to the Sims scale) at least 15 books, 5 of which are excellent, 3 of which are Bestsellers, that the author would walk away with at least $25k in their lifetime. However, it’s also realistic to be a writer your whole life and not profit like Stephen King. That’s the real horror.

(According to a report by Rocket Expansion, traditional authors can expect to make around $1.79 per book sold).

Very few writers are “writers” as a career. Many have other careers and are also a writer. The Gamer also acknowledges this real life hack in their Sims guide:

“And speaking of, while you're not required to be in the Writer career to progress through the Bestselling Author aspiration in The Sims 4, it's a reliable way to earn an income while you wait for the royalties to stack up.”

Get a damn job and stop expecting your personal writing projects to pay off, essentially. (This is painfully accurate to real life).

The most unrealistic thing of the Bestselling Author aspiration is that they defined success and what that means: having accomplished all the above. Also, reaching the “top” of a writing career means something different to every individual. Although, I think it’s safe to say that writers and creatives often feel like there is always more success to be had, another great project to be completed. Most of my writer friends would probably agree that they will never meet all these requirements in their human lifetimes, but even if they did, they would still feel as if there’s always more to do.

The Poetic Reward Trait

In the real world, I somewhat believe this is a trait you are born with: natural talent. Anyone can become a better writer, an excellent writer, but there’s a few people out there that just have a poetic bone imbedded inside their bodies. I can say, with no definitive studies to back me up, that someone who hates writing will never have the Poetic Reward.

In the game, the Poetic Reward Trait is your compensation for having completed the Bestselling Author Aspiration. It is something you couldn’t have had before.

And it’s a powerful force: the special trait allows your Sim to write a magical book called the Book of Life. (Essentially, it’s a biography that can bring another Sim from the dead). Your Sim is able to write the Book of Life of another Sim, and reading the book keeps that Sim alive.

Cheating death with words? Yes, please!

I believe books do have the power to keep another person alive. A new idea, a confirmation of existence, a quick relief. However, I do not believe that only a bestselling author has the power to write something so true to life that it actually saves lives.

So why do you write?

My Sims write because I force them to. I write because I force myself to. Sometimes it feels like a task I’ve been assigned, but sometimes, sometimes I have these small moments when I feel controlled beyond my body to sit down and write. And that stuff comes out pretty good and makes me chase the thrill of writing to understand myself and the world.

So, do I think I will be a best-selling author? Honestly, no. And I can also say that’s not my goal or definition of success as a writer.

Dag dag,

Destiny